when i was 17, i knew what i wanted for myself. i have planned out for my future, i have made all the right decisions. my moves were spot-on. i searched for the best schools that offer the best course of my choice and now, here i am, happy with where i stand. this is just a stepping stone, my future slowly moulding close to as how i had always wanted it to be.

sadly enough, the reality is, my current state is the total opposite of what's above. when i was 17, i did know what i want, but i never really worked hard for it coz i always thought i was "too young" and that i have, like, forever to get what i want. my moves were a wreck. it's close enough, but also not really. i did search for the best schools that offer the best course of my choice, and now, here i am, still doing that as those schools have such expensive fees; i would never have enough even if i combine my savings with everyone's in my family. my current school situation might or might not be a stepping stone, my future slowly moulding into something i couldn't imagine, into something i had never wanted it to be.

i really wish i was 17 again.

sigh, i am very depress right now. i just hate how things are going. when i thought the sun is finally shining upon me, dark clouds just have to pop by over my head. i pray for good news to come.