turns out, caring for him now that he's home, is more tedious than i thought. caring for him is around the clock, so to speak. having to feed him every 3 hours, not forgetting his meds and insulin jabs. i appreciate that my grandparents offered to have him stay at their house (where i'll be living in til God-knows-when) but i worry of how they're gonna take care of him when my mom and sister go back to work as per normal by next week. i mean, my grandparents aren't strong enough to lift him up if he wants to sit on a wheelchair. it's a good thing i'll be having a week of study break next week though, to prepare for the semester exam the following week.

apart from that, i feel bad seeing him in the room all alone, lying on the bed watching tv.. considering my condition right now, i don't wish to be anywhere near him, but i can't avoid that. i'm having such a bad cold since yesterday. nose is blocked, but somehow my snot just wanna seep out of my nostrils. and not forgetting this uncomfortable feeling in my throat; it's so dry. the worst part iof it all, i could barely taste any food!! i hate when it happens. and i can't even smell the food no matter how hard i sniffed it close to my nose. argh. oh and i hope i won't get a fever though, although i feel like my body's heating up. gosh it's just so horrible. so you see, i shouldn't be so close to my dad coz i'm afraid he might catch my germs.

frankly speaking, i never imagined my family having to go through something like this whenever i see the same scenario on tv. i really pity my mom. i can see that she's really exhausted and it's taking a toll on her. well, she is sick herself. and then there's my sister. being a staff nurse at the hospital, doing shifts that aren't fixed, she has to do the same thing here at home. and the both of us usually stay up all night coz he himself have trouble sleeping. and that resulted to me sleeping less than 4 hours since the day he came home. not that i'm complaining to all these, but i really hope he'll be able to walk again very very soon. if he's strong enough to do that independently, then it'll be easy. we just have to focus on his feeding and meds time.

Dear God, please give my father the strength he needs and the courage he should grasp in order to recover completely. give him a peace of heart while going through all these as i believe he feels the pain more compared to the rest of us who're just overlooking the whole situation. finally, give us, his caretakers, the patience, the strength (physically and emotionally) in this period of time.


anyway.. i'm really behind in my studies. great. i really have to catch up on everything during the study week next week. i predict my 6 weeks (i think) of school holidays will be spent at home. sigh. but that's ok. if staying home for 6 weeks will result in a full recovery of my dad, then i'm up for it. i'm glad though that all the 3 school projects are done and submitted. no more of burning midnight oil working on all those. last Monday's presentation require us all to dress formall, office wear shit. lol.











alright, my flu's really bugging me. i'm out!