& by the term 'nuclear' frm the title of my entry here, refers to the dearest mommy. *horror! coz if it's activated, my life's doomed. & Dear's too, prolly.

ok let's start frm the beginning. Dear's class was dismissed ard.. 10.30am coz the teacher buih/bubble, dint turn up for 3wks already. so obviously school ended early for him just now. so after much persuasion frm him, i skipped preethi's MME lecture at 2 & we went off to rahim's place at 1, coz Dear had been dying to get his hands on rahim's drum set. so we took the train, then the bus that'll take us directly to his place, then OH-MY-GAWD my mom was in the bus!! & my heart pumped like a speeding car abt to crash i can almost hear it beating through. well in my head at least.

you see, Dear & i have this 'ugly' history that left my parents a fugly bad impression of him, which goddamn sucks lah. that 'history' made me promise to my mom that i wont have any contact with him whatsoever, of which i break, of course - the promise i mean. only my dad has seen his face, but not my mom. but even so, i DO NOT ever want to take any chances of having my parents to see him yet, until im 100% ready. ok now lets get back to the story. when i boarded the bus, i first saw the tudung or head scarf that looked like the exact same one my mom has, & yeah, it was actually her sitting at abt the first 3 to 4 seats. i wasnt sure if she saw me boarding the bus with Dear, or saw me walking up to the bus with him tailing behind me, coz when i walked up to her to salam, she was like looking at him with that who's-that-boy-dont-tell-me-he's-azri look. gaaahh. in her mind, she's prolly thinking whether or not im still keeping in touch with him, what would happen if i still am, all those paranoia stuff.

so she asked where i was going, so i said to my friend's house to pass some lecture notes coz she dint turn up for school today & there'll be a test tmr. yesyes, another miserable lie frm yours truly. -__- & i thought of the excuse right there & then! hak. but fyi, i do feel bad lying to my mom abt half of the things happening in my life ok. but nevertheless, desperate time calls for desperate measures. so that was what i told her & she bought it.

i sat behind her, messaging Dear saying i'll be stopping at 1 bus-stop after his. unfortunately, my mom alighted at the same bus-stop i was supposed to get down at, so i sticked to my seat, giving an excuse to mom saying my stop would be the next one. haaa. so then i alighted at the next stop & waited for Dear there. goddamnit that was fucking close. so when we reached rahim's place, Dear did his thing with the drums & it was oh so freaking awesome! tapi muke kerek ah! haha. that was my first time seeing my bf in action with the drums, you know. & i want to see more more more! sadly my mood wasnt that good, coz i was pathetically still worried abt my mom, thinking she might interrogate & question me abt Dear when i get home later. but epok-epok sardine & Dear's reassurance just blew all the worries away. =]

after awhile, called mom to ask where she's at, & i said i'll be going home with her. well by right i dont want to, but just to avoid any suspicions. so i went to meet her somewhere, leaving Dear at rahim's place. on the way to meet mom, i quickly called lydia, asked for a favour - pretend to be the sick friend, in case mom asked for her number to check whether i was telling the truth. thank goodness lydia agreed. I OWE YOU ONE, BITCH! =D if my mom call that is! & so far she havent call right? k good. haha.

so i guess thats abt it. after mom & i had dinner, she willingly let me buy a pair of 3/4 black pants. i thought it looked jap-like, but when i tried it on, it doesnt look that bad. =D

alright. this is has been a long entry. Dear's still at rahim's place & will be off soon.. so yeah.

will be out for more fireworks tmr! ♥



mood worried still
music Dreaming Of You - The Coral